Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The First Few Thoughts of Christmas Eve

I have been told that one of the reasons college aged people get sick more often is because they don't sleep enough. I don't deny that this is probably true but I find it fascinating that so many of us have these incredible thoughtful or creative moments, more in the wee hours of the morning than in the middle of the day. It makes me wonder if that's something God programmed into us during this specific age because our bodies are young and agile and can handle it.
These moments where I find my pen flying across paper forming rhymes of poetry or songs, or nights I spend typing away some curious thought or metaphor in the form of a blog. Either way it makes me wonder...

The Psalmist talks about lying awake at night a lot. Sometimes it's because he is distraught, other times it's because he is praising the one and almighty father who has blessed him so immensely, and sometimes it's to contemplate God's law, or other such things. David was a young and agile man too. Perhaps God speaks to young people at night, inspires them, or sets off a switch because it's when we are most likely to slow down, listen, observe, and/or really begin to understand things.

Young people don't really like to be idol, At least I don't. I like to keep busy, have something to do. But when I succeed at that I tend to unconsciously write my quiet time out of my schedule. It's sad, and shameful, but true. (I'm working on that though.)

I find that when I allow myself to be creative the truth comes forth. When I sit down to write, I often time surprise myself with what's in my head or my heart. I remember thing if I write them down, even if I don't keep what I write. I express myself through creative forms of writing and learn more in doing so. I think part of this is hereditary.

About this time every year I am reminded of an incredible piece of work that my dad wrote when he was about 17 years old. The first time I heard it I was probably 11 or 12. My grandmother used to record tapes for my sister and I to listen to and we often went to sleep to the sound of her voice. She would read us stories, poems, scripture, all on a tape and then wrap it up and give it to us at Christmas. It was one of my favorite gifts.
One year she found and read some old poems that my dad wrote and this one has stuck with me and always seems to come back to me at about this time of the year:

A Letter To My Runaway Child

I just felt the need to write to you, share with you. It seems that's the only way I can reach you. But that's not how it used to be. Remember? Remember how you used to get up with me in the mornings? Remember how we used to walk together and share with each other the beauty of life? I showed you my love and you gratified me in the manor of which you strive to share. You were happy then.
Are you happy now? Are you truly happy?
You try to feel me and say: "yes" but I know you too well for that.
I still get up with you in the mornings, but you ignore me. I'm always there with you, but you pretend I'm not. What happened to our relationship? Come home. I will make you whole again. Come home. I love you, and I'll always be here, waiting.
Your Loving Father God

Now, this may not be an exact copy, it's what I have in memory, and the best I can do at the moment. The thing is, I had forgotten about Christmas memories like this. And it's interesting to me that years later, but at about the same age, I wrote this song:

I used to hear you call me, but your voice now I don't recognize,
You used to stand where I would see, but my vision distorted I've lost sight,
So many voices screaming, I'm just trying to figure out what's right,
Confused within my thinking, I just want you to know how hard I try.
Guessing my way through unknown territory,
Forgot how to pray but I know you can show me...
[Chorus would go here]
I used to feel you near me, but I've become so numb, I don't know your touch
And I used to know such beauty. But that knowledge is gone with what I knew of your love.
So many thoughts I'm thinking, just trying to figure out what's next.
I don't see why you'd still love me, but then you've never been what I could expect.
I'm feeling my way through darkness and delusions,
I know I've lost my way, but you can help me through this.
[Chorus here...again]
I know this path was my own choice,
Please take me back, I want to hear your voice.
I'll give you what became obsession
just hold me so I can feel your love again...

My point in drawing this comparison is that most teenagers/young adults come to a point in their lives where they realize they may not be where they should be. That they strayed somehow and are stuck on whatever it was that took them away from where they were.
Kids who were raised in a Christian home with Biblical guidance have an understanding of this personal walk with God. The real relationship there and therefore they are soon aware of when they've gone away from it.
But I think that it's in these detours that we realize how weak we are, and how much we need God. Most of these runaway adventures wreak more havoc than we realize and it's in the pain we cause ourselves that we remember God's loving and almighty healing power.

So often I find myself forgetting what Christmas is really about. Brother Matt (My pastor) did a fabulous job at reminding me. He went through some of the lyrics of the old song O Holy Night and drew biblical comparisons. There's a lyric in one of the verses that says:
Chains shall he break, for the slave is our brother,
and in His name, all oppression shall cease.

Well, this part of the song was written during a terrible war, when people understood the reality of slavery and oppression but it has a deeper meaning too.
When Christ was born it began the beginning of the end. When Jesus was born it started. It was the beginning of the end of sorrow, pain, sadness etc. When He was born it was the beginning of the end of the power of sin.
Christ's birth brought about the end of our slavery to sin. The chains are broken, we and our brothers and sisters in Christ are set free because He came down from heaven in the form of a man to save us. Christmas is the day we celebrate the birth of our King. Christmas is the holiday of true hope and real joy. It wasn't until this day so long ago than men could begin to truly hope for better days.

In HIS name ALL oppression shall cease.

"Nevertheless, there will be no more gloom for those who were in distress....
The people walking in darkness have seen a great light;
on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.
You have enlarged the nation and increased their joy;
they rejoice before you as people rejoice at the harvest,
as men rejoice when dividing the plunder.
For as in the day of Midian's defeat, you have shattered the yoke that burdens them,
the bar across their shoulders, the rod of their oppressor.
Every warrior's boot used in battle and every garment rolled in blood
will be destined for burning, will be fuel for the fire.
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called Wonderful Counselor,
Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end.
He will reign on David's throne and over his kingdom,
establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness
from that time on and forever"
Isiah 9:1-7
(A-freaking-MEN)

Christmas is only about giving because of the priceless gift we receive through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ that began the day He was born. We celebrate this day in December and give and receive gifts in honor of the most valuable gift there is.
Christmas is a time and a holiday of Hope, for without Christ there is no hope at all. I am beyond grateful for what we have, for what I'm reminded of. For the fact that no matter how far we run away, how many times we fall, there is hope and salvation in Jesus Christ because the chains have been broken, Christ has been born, and our debt has been paid. As corny and cliche as it is to say this in a blog... PRAISE GOD!
(Yeah I said it, and I meant it, what are you gonna do?)

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

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